(this writeup was inspired by Nike’s new phenomenal ad supporting female athletes and talking about all the ‘noise’ that they deal with…)
February 11, 2025: Noise, noise, noise. In sports and in life, there’s always a lot of NOISE.
Young athletes who learn to turn off the noise during their development years, to TRANSCEND the noise, are the ones who truly are able to elevate to their highest level and experience their own greatness.
Here are some examples of ‘noise’ that you might be dealing with as a soccer player right now:
- 😠 opponent at a game who is talking trash and purposefully shoving you around and trying to get in your head and make you mad
- 🏆 society at large, reinforcing the idea that playing time, winning and scoring goals are the only thing that matter during your development
- 👩🏼🦰 peers who judge based on labels & levels (ex: position, JV/Varsity, club/ECNL, etc), not on how hard you work or how much grit you have (which ultimately are the things that determine success)
- 😭 teammates who are simply not nice, say cruel things or exhibit mean girl behavior towards you, and you have no idea why
- 🗣️ opponents, parents & fans on the sideline who seem to think it is acceptable to say completely disrespectful things to you or about you, even though you are a kid and they are an adult
- 👱♂️ your own parents who might THINK they are supporting you, but in reality they are putting a lot of pressure on you to achieve a certain thing or perform a certain way
- etc.
As a player, here's what I would say to all those people - "YOU DON'T GET TO HAVE ME!"
That’s right, you don’t get to have me. Meaning, I do not have to play the same game as you. I do not have to believe the things you believe. I do not have to DEFINE SUCCESS the way you define it. I opt out. And I rise above.
I opt out of the idea that winning is the only thing that matters, that playing time is the only definition of success today. That I can’t be great even if I’m on JV right now. I opt out of the petty sideline behavior, the cruel teammate behavior. I opt out and rise above.
As for success, I redefine it on my own terms. I know that today, success to me is moving myself forward toward the player and person I want to be in the future. Which is the best version of myself, an elite athlete that is a calm, confident, mentally tough leader. Today success to me is simply taking a step toward THAT. Even if we lose, even if I miss a goal or get scored on, guess what? I can still find success when I define it this way.
So, when noise shows up and wants to come in and wreck your focus and take your attention OFF of that definition of success, you have two choices:
(1) you can LET IT IN, let it get to you, work yourself up about it, and freely give away all your mental energy to whatever it is that is owning you
or
(2) you can CHOOSE to keep it OVER THERE, to not let it in. You can choose to smile, wave, show that you acknowledge whatever the noise is – and then walk away. And when you do this you, you TRANSCEND it. You rise above it.
Just imagine how that looks to other people. Here’s this young athlete, being confronted with all of these things that are trying to get them to react and steal their attention and their energy, and that player just looks at what is happening, shrugs, and then refocuses on themselves and their game. If I was playing and I saw someone who was able to do that, I’d be scared. The mastering of that transcendence is the ultimate tool in your mental skills toolkit.
When you OPT-OUT of whatever the person/situation/etc is trying to get you to focus on or get you to believe about yourself or what you 'should' do to be considered worthy, when you say "no actually, I don't think about that the same way you do," you transcend the noise.
A few more examples of ‘noise’ that we should talk about:
- 📱social media and the seeking of validation and likes from other people; this turns into a cycle of good and bad (you’ll get validation and good feelings from it, then you’ll get the nasty side of social media and bad feelings from it, and it becomes a loop)
- ☺️ on that same note, copious amounts of praise and external validation from coaches, parents, etc. can actually be noise as well! If people have been telling you that you are the best for years, and suddenly you find yourself in a new challenging space where maybe you AREN’T actually the best, your confidence can drop hard and fast…
These things are noise as well. Meaning they interfere with your ability to focus on your development and stay true to your definition of success. Which is that: each and every day, as long as I am moving myself forward toward the player and person I want to be, I’m having success.
When you do something great on the soccer field, like score a banger of a goal, you ARE going to receive a LOT of praise. Which is amazing yes, but don’t be fooled… it is STILL NOISE. Enjoy the validation, but stay tethered to your true self and don’t get swept away in it, because you’ll end up in the cycle where the noise controls you and determines how you feel about yourself (like I mentioned with the social media stuff above).
Here’s another example of something great you may do on the soccer field: handle yourself super well in a tough situation with a bad ref call. Most likely you are not going to receive as much praise from that as from the goal. But if you exist in a place where you have transcended the noise, its OK because YOU know that this thing (handling ourself in a resilient way) is actually going to be the thing that sets you apart from all the other goal scorers and allows you to TRULY be the best you can be.
So – you have two choices when it comes to noise from outside sources, you can let it consume you, or option 2, you can rise above it. You can keep it ‘over there’ and out of your inner space. When you keep it over there, you TRANSCEND IT.
Till next Tuesday,
💎 What I’m digging: In case you missed it above, Nike’s Superbowl ad featuring women across all sports and the messaging they fight daily (You Can’t Win. SO WIN)
👩🏽💻What I’m reading: Rest is Resistance, a must-read for those who feel like they have been swallowed up by grind culture and duped into associating their self worth with productivity and completely of to-do lists
🎧 What I’m listening to: Raising Athletes podcast episodes. Super excited to be on this podcast in a few weeks!
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Hi everyone! I’m Jenn and I create content to help female soccer players and coaches maximize individual and team potential by developing healthy mindset skills. Join other subscribers and sign up for the newsletter for all my best tips and advice!
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