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Mental Skills Toolkit:

Here’s the Best Trick for How to Get Over Mistakes in Soccer

Published: August 16, 2022
Updated: February 22, 2023
By: Jenn Ireland

Category: Growth-Mindset, On the Soccer Field, Perfectionism, Resilience

One of the most common in-game mental hangups for soccer players is moving past mistakes quickly. Replaying (and overly focusing on) mistakes during a soccer game keeps players from being able to focus their attention on the game in front of them, which negatively impacts performance and actually makes mistakes even more likely to happen. This is a very big issue for many players, and something that is very hard to change – even if you are fully aware that you are doing it.

Learning how to get over mistakes in soccer is hard. Players can struggle with this for years, sometimes even for the entirety of their career, without ever figuring out how to progress past it. This is because learning how to get over mistakes in soccer is not something that just happens on its own: it takes self-awareness, a growth minded outlook and focused mental skills training.

When your mind is in the past, you can't play Well

Replaying and dwelling on mistakes that happen during a soccer game impedes a players focus and concentration. Players easily become their own worst enemy on the soccer field because, by being unable to move past the mistake, their mind stays stuck in the past. And when you are in the past, you cannot perform to the best of your ability. This is because you need your mind HERE, in the present moment, to gather information and help you make decisions about the game around you.

When you focus your attention on missed opportunities or mistakes, you are no longer in the present moment. And ironically (and unfortunately), not being fully present is actually what leads to ADDITIONAL MISTAKES.

“If you missed a play, it’s over. You can’t dwell on your frustration unless you want to carry that frustration with you into the next play and trip yourself up with that impediment. Think about it: That past play is gone and the future play has not happened.” – George Mumford, The Mindful Athlete

It is worth mentioning that there IS value in reflecting on places for improvement, but that’s for after the game, when you have the time to sit down and think (and with a growth-minded approach, not a self-critical one). On the field, in-the-moment, is NOT the time to dwell though because (according to George Mumford again) “the minute your mind is elsewhere, the present moment is gone.”

You can’t play your best soccer when you are mentally checked out, so save the reminiscing for later.

Is getting hung up on mistakes common?

Getting hung up on mistakes in soccer is a common mental challenge for many soccer players. Soccer players (as a collective group) are often asking how to get over mistakes in soccer because they know it is holding them back from playing their best. They know that they keep getting stuck in the mindset of replaying the moment and that wishing they would have done better or done things differently is NOT going to help their game right now.

Making mistakes or missing opportunities in soccer games is a challenging thing to deal with, for sure. When you miss that wide open shot or misplace what should have been a simple pass, you are going to feel frustrated or disappointed. That is OK, it’s normal. And because these feelings are strong, they can easily take over and completely consume your attention, why is why moving past mistakes is so hard.

It’s hard to learn how to get over mistakes in soccer because the mistakes can consume your thoughts. Our brains get fixated on mistakes because of the impossibly high, unrealistic expectations of perfection that we hold ourselves to on the soccer field.

We don’t want to make mistakes because we don’t want to let our team down and we don’t want to be judged or perceived unfavorably. We need external validation from our teammates, our parents, our coach in order to feel good about ourselves and have confidence in our ability. While we may not fully realize it, we are dependent upon that validation and approval of others and (we have been led to believe) that making mistakes endangers that belonging and that approval. Hence why we are afraid to make mistakes.

soccer Is 90% Mental

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What does dwelling do to your soccer game?

The biggest thing that dwelling on mistakes does to your game, and why it’s important to learn how to get over mistakes in soccer, is that it take your attention AWAY from the present moment. And keeping your focus in the present moment is CRUCIAL if you want to play good soccer.

It is crucial because you can only play your best soccer by keeping your mind in the present moment – not in the past replaying a mistake or thinking about the ‘should have’ moments of missed opportunities. And it’s not just the past either, when your mind is in the future worrying about the outcome of the game or that goal you ‘NEED’ to score, you can’t play your best either. The best way to score is to forget about scoring (aka – stay present and focus on what you are doing now).

You play your best soccer when you can get your mind to pay attention to what YOU want it to pay attention to (the game in front of you, not the self-defeating thoughts circulating around in your head). Because it’s only when your brain is fully tuned to what is happening around you that you can maximize your potential and play to the best of your abilities.

Grow your confidence through preparedness.

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Here's how to get over mistakes in soccer

Being fully present and in-the-moment is how to get over mistakes in soccer. But how do you do this? How do you stop getting hung up mistakes? How do you move past this mental hurdle? How do you keep your mind in the present moment? Your body follows the most dominant thought in the mind, so, how to get over mistakes in soccer is to pick a new dominant thought.

There are many ways to mentally train yourself to be present, but the most helpful in the run of play, on the field, is to intentionally, and sometimes even forcibly, change your internal messaging. Neutral thinking and instructional self-talk are two mental skills tools that direct your attention onto the task at hand and both work great here.

How to change your internal messaging

Sometimes this is as simple as asking yourself “what’s next? what’s next? what’s next?” on repeat in your head over and over again immediately following a mistake. Other times it might be giving yourself a bit more detailed instruction about what you should be looking for or doing in this moment. Either way, the trick to how to get over mistakes in soccer is to focus hard on the PROCESS of the moment and what you need to be doing RIGHT now to help your team.

Here’s a bit more information about both mental skills tools:

Instructional self-talk: Instructional self talk is short, specific phrases that you use to help direct your attention to the task at hand. Instructional self-talk is meant to trigger you to take an action.

Example: Check your shoulders. Look for space. Make runs into that space. Close the space, delay the attack, position your body sideways on, etc.

Neutral thinking: Neutral thinking is judgement-free thinking and meeting the moment with no resistance. It’s about saying, this is the situation, now what do we need to do next in this situation? With neutral thinking, you identify the trust of the moment (with no negatives or positives) so that you can more quickly and easily solve problems.

Example: I just passed the ball to the other team on accident, now I need to get back and defend.

Focus on the facts to stay present

How to get over mistakes in soccer is to work hard to stay aware enough that you can keep your thoughts neither negative or positive, but instead NEUTRAL. Focusing on the facts of the moment and actions you can take is the key to moving past mistakes in soccer.

This is a hard task yes, but with self-awareness of the situation and a genuine desire to want to grow past it, you can change things.

The first and hardest step is always SEEING things for what they are. Once you realize what getting hung up on mistakes is doing to your game and how self-defeating it is because it is taking your attention away from the moment, you’ll want to work to change things. You’ll WANT to start trying to use instructional self-talk and asking yourself “what’s next?” instead of getting stuck on the mistake and thereby preemptively sacrificing your future performance.

Hi everyone! I’m Jenn and I create content to help female soccer players and coaches maximize individual and team potential by developing healthy mindset skills. Join other subscribers and sign up for the newsletter for all my best tips and advice!

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Hi everyone!

I'm Jenn, a USSF C-licensed youth soccer coach, mental skills coach & founder here at Expand Your Game. I created this site because it is the site I needed when I was a soccer player.

About me: I am a former newspaper photojournalist who loves downtempo electronic music, guacamole and books of every sort. And of course soccer! On days off you can find me researching tiny farms in Portugal , tossing a frisbee for my dog, or tending to my growing collection of indoor plants.